Things I only tell my friends

Since I have been home I have been fortunate to have lunch with friends a few times. Friends are such a blessing. The best type friend loves you in times that are dark or difficult and rejoices with you when the days are filled with happiness. A friend listens without judgment and offers honesty and encouragement. Want to be friends?

Adoption is hard, perhaps unnatural, and then toss in the children being older, and having other children in the house and it can feel like an emotional roller coast on a good day and on a bad, well…

Yet we are filled with confidence “that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to the completion until the day of Christ Jesus” Philippians 1:6. The word confidence with the Latin root words of con=with and fide= trust means to have trust, or confidence, or reliance, or belief in or faith of. We know that God is using this time to shape us and mold us and make us more Christ-like. Having confidence in the promises of God and the knowledge that adoption is difficult is comforting, but doesn’t spare the pain. I like to say this time is like laboring in child-birth, it hurts, I knew it would, and I need to cry out sometimes. I am blessed to have friends who listen to me and offer encouragement and love.

So here is some of the stuff I can only tell my friends;

One day when helping a daughter with flashcards I couldn’t help but observe her chomping loudly on her gum. She doesn’t have access to any gum. At least that is what I thought. I asked her where she got the gum, no reply. I asked again, “where did you get the gum.” No reply. “Where did you get the gum, it’s an easy answer, tell me the truth.” “El bano.” (what, from the bathroom?) I responded with “no you didn’t get gum from the bathroom. Where did you get the gum, from the trash?” The unnamed daughter replied with “the bathroom, come with me.” So I followed her to learn that she had removed the sticky 3M adhesive stuff from behind the bathroom instructions and was chewing it. At least it was the same shade of blue as the gum we chew. Did she think I usually hang instructions on the wall with gum?

So were you wondering why I have bathroom instructions? Our newest daughters came with different knowledge of hygiene then what is commonly practiced here. In Colombia toilet paper is used, but never flushed. Our girls were not taught to use “papel higenico” (toilet paper) previously, or if they were my guess is that with 7 children living in their foster family it was always an empty roll anyway! So we have posted a sign reminding kids to use paper, to flush it each time you use the toilet and to wash your hands.

Words of love. “Yo la amo mama y la quiero con tod mi Corazon” Kimberlyn typed that to me on Google translate and it means, I love you mom and I love with all my heart!

Kimberlyn is a loving girl who desires to be in a family and loved! We see a future where we look back at this time and see how wrong we were to think of the hard times and wonder what the future will be like. Yet for now, we are teaching things like sit at the table to eat, don't put the food you don't want on my plate, keep your cold feet off my legs while we eat,don't talk with food in your mouth, you may only shower once a day and for only 10 minutes. Rosita is a smart little girl and has learned that she can run the tub water for several minutes to fill the tub up and then turn on the shower water. This is her attempt to by-pass the only one bath a week rule. We have been trying to teach that baths take much longer and use a lot more hot water therefore costing significantly more than a shower and using a lot more hot water deprives other people from a warm shower. We may need another water heater!

It is the little stuff that wears you out. I wish someone would have reminded me of this a few weeks ago. When I find myself totally worn out, it is not because of the big problems. It is the way a child walks loudly over-head, or chews, talks, jumps, sings, dances or crawls along the floor during dinner with food in their mouth, it is the endless challenges of parental instruction and authority, it is the 45 minutes of constant supervision to get a child ready for bed (and they aren’t two years old), it is the crumbs on the floor like they don’t care if it is clean, it’s the “mom venga” (mom come here) instead of coming to me to ask questions, it is the repetitive “she won’t stop tickling me” or “why are they laughing at me”…
Turns out I wasn’t just worn-out, I have been ill since coming home from Colombia. I don’t know if was the 200 bug bites, travel, stress… but had a staph infection for a little while after coming home that took me to the doctor for medication, only return again few days later for ulcers in my throat. I can’t say that I have an excuse for a lack of patience, but it sure helps to know that part of the reason I am worn out is because of illness. It will be great to feel good again, soon hopefully!

We are teaching that it is okay to be different. So a few, perhaps all, of the natural kids have asked Doug or I if we could just take them back and be normal again. Jack has had friends call his parents and his family crazy for adopting. Sydney has had the opportunity to think about what normal is from a worldly perspective. From this viewpoint it looks like normal is having the “right stuff”, the “right” car (yes even by age 14 there is pressure to have your own car), the “right clothes”, to go on the “right” vacation, … We actually pray to be different, to be set apart from the rest of the world, a family that makes others wonder why are they like that and are led to a relationship with Jesus. So we are different.

Maybe God made a mistake. Well I know He didn’t, but… I just don’t have the understanding yet to know why. Why does God believe that I can parent more children and these children. Why didn’t He give me the “right” children. The children who have personalities that are easy to be around, obedient, loving, anxious to learn English and to belong in a family, who desire to have rules and limitations, children who want to have brothers and sisters, children who … God why didn’t you give these girls the “right“ family, the family who is always patient, always kind, always loving, always joyful, full of wealth … The answer is God knows that apart from Him I cannot parent any kids, more kids or these kids, but I must rely on Him.

My prayer for today,

God you are mighty and your wisdom is perfect.
Lord thank you for each of the children You have entrusted me with. I ask that You give me Your eyes to see each of them as a child of God, whom You love. Today Lord, increase in me wisdom to parent them with you and Doug, raising them for Your Kingdom. Grow my patience and understanding, help me become the mother and wife you created me to be, slow to anger and quick to forgive, remove my sinful ways of pride and self-reliance. Lord, guard our family and protect us through Your word and with the Holy Spirit preventing the enemy from having any foothold in us. Lord, increase my children’s desires to know You personally, to desire to read Your word and be in prayer with You. Surround my children with God-loving teachers and friends. Remove any negative influences from our lives. Thank You for the friends You have surrounded us with, they are a blessing to us as they minister and encourage us. Bring healing to our illness and protect us from injury. Create in me a joy that radiates with the Holy Spirit so that others will come to know You as their source of strength, peace and joy, and as their Savior and Redeemer. I ask this in the name of Jesus, Amen.

Milk Crates

This post was created on March, 26, 2011

My amazing friend Whitney joined me in Cali a couple days after Doug, Sydney, Jack and Evan returned home. I was so thankful for her arrival. I needed her to be able to listen to me when I needed to let out some frustrations and to laugh with me when we thought we had seen it all, but...

In Colombia, even in the largest cities like Cali and Bogota it is common to see traffic of every kind. We have seen bikes, pedestrians, cars, horse or mule driven wagons, men pulling trailers, motorcyles with trailers, Trucks that are more than 40 years old still climb and descending the mountains, brightly colored chivas with more people than 20 clown cars and 3 men hanging on with strong arms and curled toes , motorcycles with entire families on them... But finally we have seen the strangest mode of transportation you can pay for. While with Whitney and the girls at the same park we visited on the City Tour before, my daughter Rosa encouraged her friend Vanessa to pay a man to let her ride a milk crate down a hill on a street in the park. If only I had video to show you of a 8 year old speeding down a steep, winding hill in the park only to stop because she continued straight when the street curves. She came off the road, dropped about 18 inches into the dirt and only scrapped up her hand! Oh the liablity insurance.

What's to Worry About?

Continue praying, keeping alert and always thanking God. Col 4:2

What is your worrying skill? Are you an amateur, beginner, seasoned or professional? I think perhaps I am a genetic worrier. Do you know the kind? I am born into generational worries. Some worries are simple, ordinary. Others maybe keep us from more joy and peace, from being who we are created to be. What is your fear? Is it fear of public speaking, from spiders, heights, bad grades or a job review, declining health, divorce, death, of living with regret or guilt, … Do you worry about your children, your parents, your siblings, your neighbors, (your poodles)?

For some of you, perhaps you have worried about me. Have you worried about the decision to adopt, that perhaps it is the wrong choice. Maybe you worried about our safety during travels or while in Colombia (since it has such a reputation). Maybe you are worried about our future.
It is solely by prayer that each day I am here that can move through it without worry. It is miraculous that I am free of the burden of worry. Continue praying, keeping alert and always thanking God…

Bound for Bogota

We travelled by Avianca airlines to Bogota last night. It was Rosa and Kimberlyn's first plane ride. We have been able to witness many firsts things or at least so infrequent as to still be exciting. They admitted to being afraid of the plane ride, but they have no fears of moving to another country, attending a new school, making new friends and learning a new language. This maybe because until a couple days ago they believed their new school in the USA would have classes in Spanish for them. I wish I could show you the shock on their faces when they learned differently. While we were boarding the plane Kimberly said she was afraid, so I was able to teach her that when we have fears or troubles we ask God to be with us. That with God all things are possible, not easy, but possible. (I may have said that for me to hear). So the plane ride went off smoothly! It certainly helped that Avianca has touch screen video games for kids on the back of every seat!! Kimberly was quite excited to get to try out the bathroom too!
When we interviewed by a television station in Cali a few weeks ago they asked Doug if we would adopt again. I was talking with another mother at the hotel regarding that question while the cameras were on Doug. I told her it would take a couple of miracles for that to happen and that if God’s plan was to adopt again that he should place the desire in Doug’s heart first. I may have seen a miracle today, both Kimberly and Rosa put a candy wrapper in the trash without being told!!!
I believe that we are much safer here in Bogota, especially since we are all about business here. In Cali I asked the hotel owner to accompany me to the bank each time. I met another family there who had been robbed after leaving the bank and another family who had witnessed a robbery. The M.O. seemed to be someone was watching the bank, or possibly an employee, would call a friend who would follow the families back to within a few feet of their hotel and then rob them a gun point. Now I love to have a good story to tell and wild things seem to happen when I travel, but I have avoided any crazy stuff happening here. Even leaving Cali, Enrique our host, took us around the exterior roads as a way to keep our luggage in the back of the truck. That prevented thieves from having the opportunity to grab and go with our bags. Security is high everywhere, even funeral homes have armed guards. All security is armed, but many still carry a revolver while a dress shop has a guard armed with a shotgun! I bet those are great gowns! Colombia is the premier producer of bullet proof clothing, I didn’t see a shop for it here but I think everything is on the web if you’re in the market.
I have told you about the coffee? I just took another drink. Of course its Colombian coffee (haha). I enjoyed a good laugh typing that! It is delicious and always ready, the bouquet is mild without a hint of bitterness! The coffee maker is at least as old as Juan Valdez and I would hate to see its innards, but it has a great flavor! Our’s in Cali broke a few nights ago and Enrique had it rewired and brewing again within 10 minutes. We escaped an emergency!!
Today was a busy day in Bogota. New pictures of the girls for Colombia issued ID cards, then the ID cards, then photos for passports, then passports, a stop for lunch an appointment at ICBF (their human services), and an appointment with the Embassy doctor to get documentation for them to travel to the USA.
We are staying at La Zhuetana in Bogota and all the other families are French. Again the USA invaded! Tonight we were able to celebrate with a family that received their sentencia today and another family that brought home their daughters who are 21 months old, identical twins and precious! The French were very happy to share their California wine with us!!! Then a French mother also asked me if I had a good nanny at home to help with the 5 children. Oh the French, I love their dressing, fries and toast and a nanny sounds good too.

Tardes Calenas

We said goodbyes to Doug, Sydney, Jack and Evan. I did this morning, by Kimberlyn and Rosita can sleep through anything. Kimberlyn and Sydney have shared a bed here nearly every night, but last night she wanted the single bed to get a decent sleep. This got Rosita all upset since she doesn’t want to share a bed with Kimberlyn because she moves too much. So then this got Kimberlyn upset since no one wants to sleep by her. Wait til we have to share a vehicle, sit at the table…So Syd got the bed and Rosita chose the floor over the bed with Kimberlyn. The floors here are terrazzo and hard! The girls’ personalities are starting to come out more each day. Papa put Rosa in bed when they got up at 0400. Then Kimberlyn who sleeps in every car ride, no matter how much bumps, pot holes, speed bumps, brake slamming…woke up at 0500 and said she wasn’t tired anymore. I also slept very little last night before or after the rest of the family left, so I am hoping for an early and easy bedtime tonight. The girls never want to go to bed and delay, stall,… as much as they dare. The mornings are the same too, never want to get out of bed. Today was easy though since I told them we needed to say goodbye to the family from Spain. The girls like them very much so it was a recorded morning for getting ready. Usually Rosita showers at night and in the morning, and the rest of us are waiting for her to go to breakfast. This morning she was up and nearly skipping out of the room.
We didn’t go anywhere today. The girls swam twice, watched tv, played on the computer and we have played several games of Uno and Skipbo. Mentirosa is the word for liar by the way, I forgot what is cheater. I didn’t learn any of the vocabulary for parenting in Spanish class before. I sure could use some of those words now, like because I’m the mom and I said so. Or how about play fair, don’t pick on your sister, be kind. .. Spanish books have all about ordering from a menu, getting a hotel or finding a bathroom, but lets get to really matters in life. Oh I just heard it, tramposa, that is a cheater. If I knew all the right words they would have heard stop calling each other names and play fair. It is really quiet here without the rest of our family and our friends either. I am looking forward to Whitney arriving soon!
On Sunday we went to an upscale water park about 45minutes from Cali, called Tardes Calenas. It was great there. Many different types of pools, slides, canoes, dancing in the pool and much more that we didn’t have time to do. There was paintballing, a zip-line, soccer, go-carts, and the food was unbelievable. Doug was the only one to finish his and it nearly was the finish of him. It was about a 20 oz smoked pork steak with a Hawaiian flavor. I had a steak and the kids had junk burgers. These burgers had about a 1/3 lb burger, a slice of pork tenderloin, ham, cheese of different varieties, a sauce, onion, tomato, all on a sesame seed bun. Kimberlyn’s favorite activity there was the group dancing in the pool with an instructor. Syd is certain she is her sister because she is a dancer. Rosita has really improved her swimming skill and spent most her time swimming. Jack and Evan liked the boats and tarzan drop as well as the slides.

Aqua Park

During our time here at Hotel Pension Stein we have had the pleasure of becoming friends with other adoptive families. We have gone on outings together, ate meals together, celebrated birthdays together and grown our families together. The family we have spent the most time with is Toni and Jose' from Southern Spain. They have a son, Manuel, whom they adopted from Colombia 6 years ago at age 8 months. They are now adopting another son, who is 8 months old. Yesterday our families went to an aqua park together. It was fun to be in a big pool or a wave pool. There were also waterslides and some other water attractions. All had a good time and were ready to come home after 5 hours there. Jack, Rosita, Evan and Papa all went down a 150 foot sliding trapeze that drops you from about 10 foot over a pool. We have never seen a ride like that at any American water park. Liability concerns I am sure. The rest of us used the wave pool a lot. Kimberlyn and Rosita have improved their swimming abilities significantly.

After time in the pool we went and rode on a few carnival type rides, like a little roller coaster and bumper cars. The ride from the hotel was an hour long and we never left the city of Cali! It was warm in the vehicle and traffic is just CRAZY. There are many diesel vehicles down here and a few two-cycle cars. Many motorcycles are two-cycle. With bumper to bumper stop and go traffic all the way to the water park and back, you can imagine the smell of exhaust all the way there. Kinda like running a diesel truck and a lawn mower in your garage with the door closed for 10 minutes and then sitting in there and breathing it for a while. Most of the cabs do not have air conditioning in them, so you have to ride with the windows open to keep some air moving over you.

I would hate to need an ambulance in this city. They get to move faster than traffic, but not by much. We saw ambulances in an emergency situation a couple of times yesterday. A line of motorcycles follows after them since the ambulances creates a little space for them to get thru traffic faster.

As I said before, lane markings don't mean much and motorcycles aren't required to occupy a lane. They can weave in and out of traffic, pass between cars and at stops they all move to the front of the line of stopped vehicles. Most of this maneuvering by motorcycles takes place within inches of the cars and trucks and usually at 30+ mph. Needless to say you don't see many drivers talking on cell phones while driving. It is much too dangerous for them and others to do so. Seat belts are required by law for all passengers, but most don't wear them. Helmets are required for all motorcyclists and scooterists and they all wear them.

The worst part of our time at the water park was the bugs. I got bites over 100 times on each of my legs and have the pictures to prove it. The bugs were a small, black, gnat-type insect that is apparently mostly teeth because each bite drew a small amount of blood. Not sure why I was such a delicacy for them. Everyone who is not from Cali was bitten up (I was the worst), but the Calienos, only one or two bites. I wonder what the bugs bite when there aren't any foreigners to dine on.

We Americanos were very popular at the park yesterday. There were many students there who wanted to talk to us and practice their English. Syd met many people her age and even went off with them to different slides and pools. What a great experience for her. It was also good for our Colombian daughters to see other kids wanting to use English. So far they don't have much desire to learn or use any English. That will be changing soon.

Television

I could write a whole blog on television today. Our newest girls love to watch TV, to play games with the TV on and listen to iPods with the TV on. The TV comes on first thing in the morning and if they had their way it would stay that way. It makes me wonder even more about what was life like for them before our family. They have cable down here with many channels that are from the USA to include Disney and Nickelodeon. After about a week here our natural kids finally tried the TV. Before that they didn’t even think there would be anything in English. The boys are happy because they found a station that is in English with Spanish subtitles, and it even carries their favorite show, CSI Miami.

After lunch yesterday (Thursday) Syd, Jack and I took a cab to a shopping center called Chippi Chappe It is a “gianormous” outdoor shopping mall with many little shops, food court and an Exito, which is the Latin Walmart. We mostly went to look, but we bought some cactus fruit and candy for gift bags at Rosita’s birthday party next Monday. You should see how armed the security guards are here, especially when making money drops at the mall from the armored car.

Last night the news cameras turned on us. We were interviewed by a local reporter about our adoption. They asked questions about why adoption, why older, how long did we wait, would we do it again, how is it going… I should have given them the address to the blog, right? I was asked to answer their questions in Spanish since I know a tiny bit, but Doug got the harder questions since our interpreter helped him.

Some of kids swam yesterday in spite of rain and temperatures in the low 70’s, 2 of them swam twice. Today the weather is warm and sunny and we are going to the water park.

City Tour and Museums

City Tour and Museums


So here is what’s happening in Cali. On Tuesday we got to see more of Cali from the Mountain highs. Enrique has a driver that took us up to the Mountain top that is the location of the statue of Cristo Rey. The statue was first built to celebrate 50 years of peace in Cali during the early part of the 1900’s and has since been rededicated once. From the location of their protector, Christ the King, you can look down over all of Cali. The population of Cali is about 2.5 million and that is all in once city. There are no suburbs here. The road leading up to the statue is typical of the winding up a mountain side, except well it was a narrow blacktop with zero visibility. We did get to see the results of a motorcycle crash on our way up. Again houses, buildings and schools were built into whatever space existed on the mountain side. We saw some neat sculptures that were built by a Colombian artist into the soft stone. The sculpture is Indigenous in style of faces and animals.
Once down from the mountain top we went to a park there and a church in it that was built in the 1700’s. We were permitted in once we knocked on the door and a resident nun let us in. There are still worship services there. The kids were excited when they saw and ice cream truck pull up, but they were only there to deliver to A LOT of ice cream to the nuns. I guess if I couldn’t marry I would eat a lot of ice cream too. Maybe it was for an ice cream social.
We continued our descent and went to a Plaza with a statue of Simeon Bolivar. The Statue is photographed, but there is much to learn just by watching people, traffic, street vendors… It is a busy plaza with all types of people. Many students, business people, young people distributing information on Cali, disabled laying on mats hoping for gifts of money, vendors selling garlic to juices, fruits and snacks. The business men sat on benches and a homeless man slept behind the bench. The social system is different with much less or no assistance available from the government for the disabled. Our interpreter said they are taken care of by their families.
That was our final stop for the day as we had one daughter with a headache and a son with a stomach ache. He has not been prone to car sickness, but if you ever you are going to experience it, I think the mountain roads, followed by city traffic without much regulation will cause it.

What's to eat and do in Cali?

Hola all! We are staying busy while in Cali. The weather remains very mild especially if you are from Iowa. We are comfortable here in shorts or pants, short sleeved shirts in the day and add a light jacket for the evening. Sandals are my choice in foot ware. It has rained about half of the days we have been here, but it is the rainy season. It hasn’t rained for an entire day yet, only for a few hours.
On Friday we went to the fruit and vegetable market. It was very interesting. You have tables overflowing with fruits primarily, but there are also some vegetables and herbs. We were able to try many varieties of fruits. We don’t know most of them in English. Some we are very familiar with, melons, apples, pears, bananas, kiwi, grapes, mango, pineapple, guava…, but then we also had lulo, a cactus fruit, something that sounds like aunion, grenadilla ( it’s the one the kids now refer to as bird snot), guanabanya, palm fruit and many others whose name I can no longer remember. You could hear the chickens that were still living nearby, but the less fortunate were hanging inside on hooks, ready to be prepared for dinner. There were also sides of pork and beef as well as fish from rivers and the sea. You could purchase drinks, juice, sodas, water, beer or meals prepared there. It was a huge market and there of course are many others like it in the city. I only saw one hydrant for getting water, and none of the vendors had water at the tables they rent. If you bought meat they would debone it or fillet it for you right there.
We saw other objects to purchase that were handmade items like brooms from plant life which is typically used and not for decoration. Enrique, the hotel owner and our host at the market purchases all his fruits, vegetables and meats at the market every Friday. So we are now eating at t he hotel what we saw and tried there. The fruits are very delicious. If you haven’t read my Facebook entry you missed Doug’s joke that made me laugh to tears. He said “I have more seeds inside me than an Earl May.” Incase your unfamiliar with Earl May it is a seed store in Iowa. I laughed so hard when he told me. It was the uncontrollable type of laughter that does the body good. We laugh and play much, but it is so necessary to have the laughter that helps us keep going. It is not all giggles when you have 5 kids and they are just getting to know each other, speak different languages and … It is hard to keep everyone happy all the time.
We swim every day…well the kids swim every day. I love swimming, but the water is very cool here. So I don’t really swim. Rosita has grown much more comfortable in the water and is no longer using any type of flotation device. Kimberlyn also loves the water, but always wears something floaty.
On Saturday we took and excursion to El Museo de Cana de Azucar. It is a sugar cane museum. It is similar to Living History Farms in Des Moines where you can see historical farms. It didn’t have any modern equipment. At the end we had some sugar cane juice and purchased some cane we haven’t yet tried. My guess is it is really sweet. Colombians love all things sweet. The tour was in Spanish so it didn’t hold a lot of interest for the kids, not even the Spanish speakers. The gardens were magnificent. We were unfortunately the final tour of the day so they were anxious to get rid of us. But I took many pictures as we were walking from one farm example to another. The car ride out there was about an hour long and was also interesting to since we travelled through smaller towns and we could see a different lifestyle. We have seen homeless digging through trash bags and eating whatever is available. This isn’t as common in the area we live in here, but more in other parts of town or in the smaller surrounding towns. It is common employment for people of all genders and ages to be selling snacks or fruit, or phone chargers or little birdies tied by string at the foot on the street corners, or to wash your car windows, whether you desire it or not expecting, payment at the end.
As far as the roads go, it is possible that they have the best drivers possible here. I believe this because I can’t imagine driving here. The roads don’t appear to have any lane designation, and if they did it wouldn’t matter. Traffic lights don’t seem to have much significance either. I believe the primary rule is whoever has the largest vehicle has right-of-way. Even in a city of 4 million people the streets are a mix of cars, trucks, buses, vans, motorcycles, scooters, animal driven vehicles as well as bicycles and some human pulled carts. We haven’t witnessed a crash or a tire with proper tread on them. The cars occasionally have paint transfer on them from rubbing, but not much damage. Cali does have mostly one-way streets; however nothing is straight, not even for one block! It would be so easy to get lost driving here. There is no time to adjust towards the inside or outside lanes of the street to change streets. So often times you will see turns to the right from the far left lane with lots of horn honking. I’m pretty sure it’s not for encouragement.
Yesterday was a trip to a restaurant. Enrique told us today the weather is not so good so we will go to a fine restaurant. So we put on the better clothes we brought and headed off with Enrique and his family as well as 5 other families. We did not know where this restaurant was, but it was a great ride out of the city and up into the mountains. We travelled for at least an hour, seeing pueblos built along the narrow roads into the mountain side. Along the way you could purchase anything from drinks and snacks to cell phone minutes, gas or goats. Speaking of gas, it cost 8,000 Colombian Pesos for one liter of diesel. That is about $4 per liter. Ouch, yet taxi’s are very inexpensive here. The restaurant served typical Colombian food and it was delicious. Doug shared with Rosita what is commonly thought of as the national dish, Bandeja Paisa. It seems more like this dish was invented by someone who thought “ I don’t know what to make for dinner, but I have red beans, rice, sausage, some ground beef, a piece of bacon and an egg to fry.” I had a typical soup, Salcochoco con Pollo. When they said with chicken they meant it. The soup part had a chicken liver, heart and foot in it. All that considered, it was still delicioso. Like the soup wasn’t enough, it also came with a chicken hindquarter, rice and avocado on the side. It was really good, but I didn’t eat any chicken toes. There was also a little playground and three caged parrots. The Spanish dad that is here to adopt tried to get the birds to talk, I told him that the parrots only spoke English. Always a joker, huh. Hacer un chiste (to make a joke). We had to learn these words quickly here to say we were only joking.
Today was another big day. For those who have adopted from Colombia, today was our Intergracion. The day where we get to say we want to continue as a family and begin the legal process of adoption. The girls, Doug and I, our translator and a Sociologist all discussed how our family is adjusting and functioning. Then we were asked and the girls were asked if we want to be a family. Estamos en acuedos (we agree we) want to be a family. So by tomorrow we will learn what court we have randomly been assigned to. This only matters because some courts are faster than others which means we get to come home sooner.
So if you would like to pray for us, I would ask for;
Continued bonding of our family, for the siblings to see the good in each other rather than to see how they are treated differently, for the desire to be obedient without having to be told repeatedly, and divine knowledge of English and Spanish (hey, pray big, right?)`. We are so thankful for safety and health, for this opportunity to grow our family and for the support of family and friends!

His unchanging plan has always been to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. Ephesains 1:5

The Meeting----La Encuentro

How am I to pick the words to describe meeting Kimberlyn and Rosita. We were picked up by our interpreter and went for a very interesting ride in 2 taxis to arrive at the office of ICBF. It was very well guarded. I don’t know why that is the case, but our interpreter needed to leave an ID with the guard and it was all gated in. We were met by our attorney there and we all went upstairs to wait our turn to talk with a committee about any final questions and receive information about the girls, like Rosa goes by Rosita. We received copies of their identification card and a letter saying that we accepted total responsibility for their health, safety and emotional well being while in our care. The facility was really warm and the furnishings were very well used. There wasn’t a board room to meet in, just a table that barely fit all of us. That is how it is here. They do not live in a society that is so disposal. Nothing seems to be replaced until it can no longer be fixed. Remodeling because you want a change doesn’t appear to happen. I appreciate that. Then the moment we were waiting for.
Syd, Jack and Evan saw them first. There were 2 doors in a corner, each facing a different way. They snuck the girls in one door while we were in the room behind the other door. When the attorney opened the door to let us know they had arrived, the kids saw the girls through the crack of the door. We left the table and went through a tiny passage and around the corner and we were greeted by Rosa and Kimberly. I cried! Rosa jumped up immediately and ran to me with a hug, and then she ran to Papa while Kimberly ran to me. All the kids joined in on the hugging. Later Doug over heard Jack telling Evan that he nearly cried and Evan said “I almost cried twice!” After hugs all around and then a second go around of hugs and kisses we sat down and we gave them some backpacks filled with things. One of them was bracelets that we helped them put together with their new names. Rosa put Rosita Houston on hers, but Kimberly could only put Kimberlyn because that is a long name and her wrist is very tiny. The time there was short and back to the taxis to ride to our hotel.
Back here we were greeted by staff and other families and took a few pictures as a family. The girls are so excited by electronics that we have decided to limit the opportunity and for this reason I haven’t blogged as much as I desired. It has been fun watching them use the computer and sing along in Spanish to the Ipods, but we must limit screen time so that we can bond. Much to the dismay of Evan they love Justin Beiber y Demi Lovato y Selena Gomez y Miley Cirus y jonas brothers y katy perry y etc. (Rosita typed that for me.)
It is very loud in our life right now. The girls love to tickle, they say “chica chica” when the tickle. They also adore their older sister and both desire to the one who gets to share the double bed with her. They are good eaters and can eat more than my boys combined. It is going to be interesting in our house because Kimberlyn is quite an actress. She loves to be the center of attention. Do remember that has been Evan too. WOW is it crazy. It seems that there is a game afoot of “one-ups-manship” for the youngest four that really seems to play out at meals.
We have been busy, mostly in the hotel. We went on an excursion yesterday with the hotel owner and other families to the zoo. Our newest girls love to take pictures, therefore I have lots of evidence we were there. After lunch we swam and played games, both electronic and otherwise. I brought many games and crafts. We have played Uno, Checkers, Kazink, Sequence, and tried Cribbage. We have made bracelets and colored. Painted nails and braided hair. I have learned lots of new vocabulary I never needed before in Spanish. Right now I can barely type only in English and had to ask Doug how to spell words in English because I could only think of the Spanish word.
It’s a small world after all. Walt Disney got that right. You won’t believe this, but another family staying here is adopting a girl and a boy from the same foster family as Kimberly and Rosa. So that was delightful to meet them and we can exchange information for the future. The down side is if they could, Rosa and Kimberly would spend all their time with Vanessa and Sebastian. I can only imagine what a hard week the Senora has had, saying goodbye to four kids. Other than her daughter, there is one girl from ICBF left in her care. Leidy is her name and she is 11 years old. I ask you to pray for her to have a family soon. It would be an awesome miracle if she were a part of the Kidsave Summer Miracle program hosting Colombian Orphans in Des Moines Iowa and while there met her forever family!
Tomorrow we are going on an excursion with the owner, Enrique, to the fruit and vegetable market. We don’t plan on leaving the hotel much on our own for safety reasons. There is a small shopping center 4 block from here that is called LA Catorce (14) that I have been to twice for little items.
There have been many times of bonding already with games, tickling, crafts and laughter. Sometimes I think you can hear us from there. I just asked Kimberlyn how is the Houston family and she said “la familia Houston is muy divertida.” Eso es! She said the Houston families is very fun and I added THAT’S IT!
We give praise and thanks to God for placing all of our children in our care and pray that He will help us raise them for His Glory.

Colombia Dia UNO

Greetings from Colombia!
Our travels began yesterday at 0500 (thats AM) when our friends who really love us (since they got up super early) met us at our house to take us to the airport! We flew to O'hare, Miami and then to Cali, Colombia. The flights were all on time and smooth sailing, but still it was a long day. We arrived in Cali at about 2200 EST or 10 PM and we were very tired. We were the last off the plane, so the last through customs. When we finally departed with our luggage we went out expecting to find someone our agency lined up to meet and transport us. There was a bit of confusion. After borrowing some guys phone, calling our representative in Bogota and some more waiting we got a ride to our hotel We are staying at a beautiful hotel called the Hotel Pension Stein. It specializes in hosting adoptive families and I love it already. We have 3 rooms already, but will be squeezing in our newest daughters tomorrow! The architecture and flora surrounding it is beautiful.

It is fun to see all the other families here with their beautiful children. We are anticipating meeting them tomorrow. What will that feel like? Will I jump or dance, will my legs shake as I wiggle in anticipati/on... I think for certain there will be tears! What are they feeling today? When I asked my boys what they thought Kim and Rosa maybe feeling they said anxious, scared, fearful, excitment... Doug said "they probably heard of Evan already." Jack said "heard of him, they probably have heard him." Evan was a little loud while in the pool a little while ago.

We have met with our lawyer and with our translator today. We are prepared for our first meeting with Rosa and Kimberly tomorrow at 2PM. Following our introductions Kimberly and Rosa will stay with us. We have a week to get to know each other and then return back to have a another meeting to begin the legal process of adoption!

Wait, What

Wait, What? Those are frequent words in our house. I no longer can remember who started it, but now it is a slogan that brings smiles and giggles. So when you heard the Houston’s are adopting, did you think “Wait, What???” We want to answers the Top 10 Questions we have been asked. God create the desire to adopt in us and now we are chasing after that dream.

10. Why International?

We believe that all types of adoption are God ordained ways to grow families and care for children. We desire to help children whose futures are uncertain. For each person considering adoption God will lead you in where to go.

9. Why Colombia?

My God given personality believes that there are no strangers in this world, just people I have yet to meet. So I met someone at Fareway who had just completed an adoption of a child from Colombia who she met through a program called Kidsave. Colombia has sibling sets, the kids are well cared for by the government, we speak some Spanish and the children are beautiful!

8. Are they sisters?

Yes. Colombia has sibling sets ranging from 2 to 7 and ranging in age from infants to 15 years old.

7. What happened to their parents?

Colombia has orphans due to all the main reasons, abuse, neglect, abandonment, internal conflict or violence in the country, AIDS, and poverty. Our daughters’ history is theirs to share when they are ready. We are waiting to talk about it with them and fill in the gaps of their memories with whatever information we may have when we feel the girls are mature enough.

6. Do they speak English?

We don’t believe that they know much yet? About as much English as Jack and Evan know Spanish! Fortunately Doug and I know enough Spanish to feed them and care for them. We will be asking for help for the big emotional issues pre-adolescent girls have even when not dealing with moving to a new country, learn a new language, eating different foods…

5. Why Older Kids?

We want to parent more, but not forever. Well that is true, but for us our hearts were softened to help the children for whom their hope is reduced. Many children remain without families only because of their age. Children beyond the age of 8 have a much reduced chance of finding a family. I copied the following data from Kidsave.org
The longer children live in institutions or foster homes without a stable, loving adult connection, the bleaker their future becomes.
• 1 in 10 will commit suicide
• Less than half will finish high school
• 1 in 3 will be homeless
• 50% will end up in jail
• 1 in 4 will become parents before the age of 20, and their children will likely end up in orphanages or foster homes
• Many will turn to drug trafficking or prostitution to survive
Many of these children are overlooked for adoption because they are “older” (more than six-years old) and parents believe they don’t want to be, or can’t be adopted. It is not okay.

4. How long will you spend in Colombia?

We will all be travelling to Cali, Colombia together. A day after we get there we will get Rosa and Kimberly and they will stay with us. After the first week together we will have a meeting and it will be decided at that time to start the adoption process that will be finished a few weeks later in Bogota. Doug, Sydney, Jack and Evan will be returning home after a few weeks. My dear friend and college roommate, Whitney, will be joining us for a couple of weeks. It will be great to have her help and company.

3. Does it cost a lot to adopt?

Yes and No. It does look like a lot, but the costs are spread out across the process so it isn’t so overwhelming. Additionally there are adoption grants, loans and tax deductions that help with the expense. We also knew we were going to do this so we cut out vacations, gave up eating out, found entertainment in board games, borrowed books… We also received a gift of frequent flier miles that will bring our girls home. I think it costs more to give up dreams. Our lives will be enriched by bringing Rosa and Kimberly into our family.

2. How did you get African kids from Colombia, South America?

Colombia had a slave population like in North America. From Wikipedia ; “It has been estimated that only 4.4 million Afro-Colombians actively recognize their own black ancestry, while many other African Colombians do not, as a result of inter-racial relations with white and indigenous Colombians.[3] Afro-Colombians may often encounter a noticeable degree of racial discrimination and prejudice, as a socio-cultural leftover from colonial times. They have been historically absent from high level government positions. Many of their long-established settlements around the Pacific coast have remained underdeveloped.[3] In Colombia's ongoing internal conflict, Afro-Colombians are both victims of violence or displacement and members of armed factions, such as the FARC and the AUC.

1. What can I do to help?

We ask for your prayers, specifically for;

For Kimberly and Rosa

Pray for God’s protection of their minds, bodies and spirits! Comfort of the Holy Spirit. Healing from the difficult start in life, of hunger, abandonment, loneliness, abuse, and feelings of rejection, the healing that only Jesus Christ can bring us in grace and justification to find all our worth in Him. For the gift of knowledge to learn English. To understand what adoption and living in a family means. To look forward with anticipation and joy to meet us and move to the USA.

For Syd

For God to always increase her desire to love and Follow Him. To surround her with God loving friends who come from Christian families. To give her strength and knowledge to walk as a child of God in this broken world and to be set aside different as the salt and light of the world. For her to maintain her great academics even while away for a few weeks from school.

For Jack

To understand the great need of orphans in the world and our opportunity to be the body of Christ serving His children. To discern the leading of the Holy Spirit. For Jack to have God loving friends from Christian families. For him to have increase immunity and to protect him from sickness.

For Evan

May God work in Evan to feel the presence of the Holy Spirit guiding him, increasing his desire to learn about God and grow in personal relationship with Him. That Evan is surrounded by God loving friends and teachers.

For Doug and I,

that we remain in unity and agreement as we parent. That we seek the wisdom of the Heavenly Father to guide our children. That His peace surround us in the middle of the chaos we are entering into, in travel, changes in dynamics of our family and marriage, finances, and in all the things we are not able to foresee or understand. Protection from the spiritual battles and plans of the enemy.

Willingness to be obedient. The gift of wisdom and knowledge of Spanish. For discernment of the promptings of the Spirit and to see God at work in our lives. For safe travel and for God to place things in order for us. For the wisdom to use the finances God has provided for us for His glory.

That we get the perfect housing arrangements and are safe and healthy.

That our time in Colombia is full of great memories and we are home without having the expense of having to adjust our tickets unless it is to come home early!

If you would like to help the plight of Orphans support organizations like World Vision or Compassion International.

Encourage an environment that is supportive to adoption.

Make tax deductible gifts to the James 1:27 Foundation that offers grants to Iowa families adopting. You can contact them at james127@partnercom.net or mail a gift to
James 1:27 Foundation ,504 Butler St, Melbourne, IA 50162
Consider hosting an Orphan in your home through the Kidsave program, visit http://kidsave.org/

4000 Words

Obedience

"Dear Friends, you always followed my instructions when I was with you. And now that I am away, it is even more important. Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him." Philippians 2:12-13 NLT

Doug and I have discussed adoption over several years. Perhaps this is your story too. Why adopt? Why adopt older, international, or siblings? What about if they have a difficult start that disrupts your family? What about the cost? Don't you want to enjoy your retirement? What about... college, orthodontics, weddings, vacations, comfort, security, an easy life... Can we attach and bond with them. What if they break our hearts? What if we never love them? How will it change our family? Will others accept them? Are we crazy? What does God say about adoption?

We have wrestled with all these questions or have had people ask us about them. For me it was through prayer my life was changed. I prayed for the Lord to open my eyes and let me see the world they way He does. My heart was broken for the need for families for all of God's children. God gave us the desire to do what pleases him. What does God say about widows and orphans? If you want to check out some scriptures look at the following;
God adopts Us--Romans 8:15, Gal 4:5 and Eph 1:5
God commands us to care for Deut. 24:17, Isaiah 1:17, James 1:27, Romans 12:13
God promises us he knows them Psalm 139:13-15
He sees them Psalm 10:14
He has compassion on them Psalm 68:5-6
He defends them Psalm 10:18
He will come to them John 14:18

In a blog named the Abba Fund(http://abbafund.wordpress.com/) Bob Ewoldt wrote the 5 Reasons Christians should adopt;

1. The problem is huge
2. Christians value human life
3 We bring glory to God
4. We have a huge impact
5. We imitate Christ

I would add number 6, we are being obedient. The decision to adopt came down to obedience to God's will for us. We had many affirmations of God's plan for us, through prayer, other Christians words for us as a result of prayer, scripture and eventual PEACE. Some of the barriers that were the largest for us were fear and discomfort. Do you see tools of the enemy here. We are comfortable with 3 kids and the place we are in life, mostly coasting along enjoying our comfortable existence! A useful way to seek God's whispers in our life is of course in scripture and prayer in having a relationship with our Creator and Author of our life, but also in the feelings we are given. Feelings of peace or lack of. Another way is to see how does this decision look like from a worldly perspective. Does the expense of international adoption of 2 adolescent girls with difficult histories that may make for difficult futures, who speak no English who will cost a lot to raise and will expose layers of my heart to pain as they mature and overcome issues of abuse, neglect, racism, abandonment, rejection, hunger, who will change the dynamics of my family resulting in less resources of time and money for my biological kids, to have to defend our decision to family, friends and strangers make sense to our world outside of God? Mostly no, it sounds like from a worldly point of view to be upside down. In faith it sounds like a God thing to do! I do not know which topic is discussed more in scripture, caring for widows and orphans or obedience to God. "But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" Joshua 24:15

Waiting

Waiting. That maybe the only word neccesary to describe the last several months. Waiting, maybe the worst of all earthly activites. It can be a time of anticipation or it can be unbearable and it may switch minute by minute. My favorite song during this time was from the sound track of the movie Fireproof, While I'm Waiting, by John Waller. It begins with "I'm waiting, I'm waiting on you Lord and I am hopeful, I'm waiting, I'm waiting on you Lord although it's painful, I'm waiting on you Lord, but patiently I will wait. Waiting is painful. Sometimes people will make a decision, even a wrong decision to end the pain of waiting.

Once our dossier arrived in Colombia it was translated and we immediately receive a referral. The referral was for 3 children. That was a surprise to us. We had only asked for 2 kids between the ages of 8 and 12, and requested the oldest to be a girl so that we could share bedrooms. We were very excited to get the referral so quickly but 3 kids changed everything, the cost of adoption and travel, how to share bedrooms, a bigger vehicle, more of everything! The referral included information on their histories and I was moved to tears. For those of you who know me, that isn't so hard to imagine.

The oldest child was an 11 year old boy, who God has BIG plans for. His serving and sacrificial love for his siblings is honorable. We spent a weekend in prayer and conversation and felt that we were not able to accept referral of these children. We wrote our denial letter to Colombia stating we had only asked for 2 kids and were unable to accept these 3 kids. It was a difficult decision, those children need just what we have to offer, a family. I continue to pray for those children to have a God loving family. Within a week we received a phone call from our adoption agency that was shocking. Our program director told us that this has never happened before to them, but Colombia was wondering if we would consider a referral of the youngest 2 children of the same sibling group. We were even told that the oldest child had been spoken to about adoption and he stated that if it meant his brother and sister could have a family he wanted them to be adopted without him. We had peace in our earlier decision, but why was this happening. Often when I hear things that have never happened before, or not what I would choose, I start looking for God's fingerprints. I had the desire to end the pain of waiting. I wanted to accept the 3 kids. We never contemplated dividing the kids up, but went back to considering the 3 again. I went to bed that night tearful and sad. Sad that perhaps that the best chance for these brothers and sister was to be seperated and sad that we are waiting in a broken world. I know that our mourning will be turned to JOY. I am hopeful, but yet I am still waiting, and its not easy. I woke up in the middle of the night, angry. Angry that we were put in the position of having to make a decision to divide family. We are obediently adopting to unite family and grow the Kingdom. Confident in our first decision and at peace we said no.

Continuing the lyric's of While I'm Waiting. "I will move ahead bold and confident, taking every step in obedience, while I'm waiting. I will serve you while I'm waiting. I will worship while I'm waiting. I will not faint, I'll be running the race even while I'm waiting."

The next phone call from our adoption agency was only a couple of weeks later. On October 23 while I was getting my hair cut, I saw the most desired of area codes appear on my phone, 314. When I spoke with Ashley she said Colombia had "pseudo-referral" for us. It was sisters ages 9 and 11. She said the reason it wasn't a normal referral was because the girls were dark skinned and Colombia didn't want to write the long referral if we wouldn't accept AfroColombianas. I said we will and she said it will go quick. Well due to some paperwork errors and who knows what else, quick was more than 8 weeks later. Then it was still another week! Our agency received the referral from Colombia, but was unable to translate some of the faxed documents due to the quality of the fax, so it had to go by slow mail. So Ashley and Nichole could see pictures of our girls and tells us they were beautiful, but we had to wait. Intense waiting! Finally we were sent their pictures and the referral letter only. As I opened the email with their picures tears just streamed down my face. They are beautiful!! I had been waiting so long to see them.
What joy, what peace just in time for us to share over Christmas with family! We couldn't wait to be able to say yes, but we had to wait more. Just a few more days to receive the entirety of the referral, their historical, familial, medical... info. Yes! We said YES. Now guess what we are doing?

Waiting!

"I'm waiting. I am waiting on You Lord. And I am peaceful, I am waiting on You Lord. Though its not easy, but faithfully I will wait. Yes I will wait. I will serve You while I'm waiting. I will worship while I'm waiting" by John Waller.

Waiting, Worshipping, Serving, and I am peaceful. Okay we have also been drywalling, painting, laying flooring, putting in light fixtures, hanging doors, moving furniture. Okay I was waiting and serving in as many ways as I could at Lutheran Church of Hope and Doug was doing all the hard work in our basement. I had know idea when I married him what skills he would have! Soon the basement will be done and Syd, Rosa and Kim will have a room to share down there!

We believe our wait to meet our daughters will end as we anticipate travelling to Colombia in March. Just wait and I'll know more soon!

Peace of our Lord be with you!